Why do you understand how to live correctly, but you cannot change your life

– You said that your dog’s nutrition is better than that of many people. I can say that this applies to me as well.

“People define the concept of ‘good’ differently. Recently I was talking with my mother and I was preparing food for my dog. My mother asks me: ‘And what do you put in her bowl?’ I begin to explain that she has a raw diet: the main ration is raw meat, for example beef or lamb. Liver обязательно is included in the diet, there are additional offal products. This is quite serious nutrition and serious attention to nutrition. There are also vegetables, for example. She asks: ‘And what kind of grain do you make for her?’ I say: ‘I make either buckwheat or quinoa.’ And to this my mother, who lives in Minsk, says: ‘If our pensioners saw you, they certainly would not understand this.’ Not only pensioners would not understand this.”

…And a question arose for me. Does nutrition, sleep, and other basic things that everyone is supposed to know influence a person’s state? Or maybe this is just physiology? Or is it something else?

– It is clear that a person’s state is influenced by a huge number of factors. Then the next question arises: why does my dog eat healthy food, while many people cannot?

It is important to note: my dog did not make a choice in favor of healthy food. I am sure that she would gladly eat all sorts of junk, but she is simply not given it. She is given meat of good quality. She is in a state of absence of choice. She chooses nothing – everything was decided for her. And it was decided correctly.

I am such a parent. My sister and I often discuss that we pay a lot of attention to talking with children about nutrition. We highlight the difference between healthy and unhealthy, we try to bring truly good nutrition into the family. Good nutrition is not a question of drinking Coca-Cola or Coca-Cola Zero. Good nutrition is immediately knowing that Coca-Cola is poison.

When you know that a jar of Nutella contains 30–40% sugar – there is even a cool picture showing how much sugar is in it, such a visual layer, 30 or 40 percent, and in some countries almost 60 or 70 – when you know this and show it to children, when you restrict somewhere and somewhere form normal awareness in them, explain, talk, this starts to work.

Because there was a time when laws existed and it was not required to write on the packaging what a product was made of. And now it is required. People have the opportunity to find out and to look. People wanted to know about this. When I was a child, I did not have such an opportunity. No one told me about this. Did my parents really not know that drinking Sprite is wrong? Or that eating three kilograms of grapes at once is abnormal? They knew that eating chips is unhealthy. Obviously, my parents understood many of these things.

Then the question arises: if they knew, why did they not transmit this? Why did they not explain, not tell? Including because they themselves could not cope with it. Somewhere this was not discussed, somewhere they simply did not look at it.

And here we return again to the question: why does my dog, without any knowledge, without explanations, without awareness, immediately find herself in a certain nutrition system that affects her condition? How she smells, what her coat looks like, how she sleeps, how she feels inside. This affects her teeth. This even affects the number of years she will live. This also affects my future expenses that may arise from outside.

Why does this happen automatically? And there are many such aspects. Here the question arises: do we have enough strength? Does a person have enough strength to see this?

The thing is that a huge number of people simply do not have the strength to see this. There is no strength to learn this. We are used to being told that, for example, there is no talent. But often the issue is not talent, but the presence of inner energy.

Here is my example. I started playing the piano at the age of 42. In our home, since childhood, there was a piano. I lived in the same room with my sister, and this instrument stood there all my life. Then, when it seems that my sister remained living in that apartment, she sold it. But the fact is that the piano was always nearby. I never once opened it.

And here it is important to emphasize: I really did not have the strength. Because now this strength has been born in me myself. And this has nothing to do with age. Someone will say that this comes with age. Come on! A huge number of people do not engage in what they could engage in, even when they have the opportunity.

When I lived in Moscow, I also had a piano at home. Two daughters studied on it. I again never opened it. What is the difference? What is the difference between that piano and this one? Why did I start studying here, but not there? That is what matters. And this concerns not only, for example, the influence of sleep. This is a question of having strength for certain actions.

For example, all my life I had the strength to go to bed early and wake up early. We can study any technologies, read any theories – everywhere it will be written that it is useful to go to bed earlier and get up earlier. This was always the norm for me. I remember how at some point I began to get up even earlier – at 5 a.m. Before that I got up at 7. Now for many years in a row I have been getting up at 5–6 a.m. I began to get up at 5 because someone said that it is even more beneficial. But in general, even before that I lived in a harmonious regime. My children also lived in a harmonious regime. And my wife – more or less. At least she also goes to bed before 10–11 p.m.

At the same time, I know a huge number of people who all their lives try to build their sleep. For them it is colossal work: trainings, books, work with psychotherapists. And these are people who really want to do this. I am not even talking about those who do not want to. They want to – and they do not succeed. They cannot. Although, it would seem, what is the difference? I did not even strive for this specially. It just happened naturally for me.

Just like my dog did not choose to eat raw meat and proper food. Moreover, the breeders brought the dog and said: “Here is the food, feed her with it.” She did not ask ChatGPT what the best nutrition for a Russian borzoi is according to Russia, France, and the USA over the past 100 years, with evidence, research, and details. But the fact remains: optimal nutrition for her is a diet based on raw meat. This is a natural situation in which everything happened by itself.

And here another question arises: why do I treat my dog this way? Why do I have such an attitude at all?

When we bought the dog, there was a period when she went to the toilet at home and ate all of it. Then she vomited, then she went to the toilet again. An endless cycle. And this happened everywhere – on carpets, on sofas, literally everywhere. My wife then began to shake strongly: so much so that she began to tell her friends and everyone around that dogs are not needed, that this is horror, a nightmare.

Now she remembers this as something distant. At the same time, the dog has not changed, she is the same. The circumstances seem to have changed, and at the same time maybe they have not. But the state in relation to the dog has changed. What does this say? That tomorrow she may again have exactly the same state. And I always had the same feeling toward the dog – calm, even, regardless of what she did.

At the same time, I always had a calm state with the understanding that this dog exists today, and tomorrow she may not exist. Because circumstances may arise in which we will have to, for example, give her up. This can happen.

My mother recently said: “Well, come on, you probably don’t really think that you would be able to calmly give up the dog.” I can. Very calmly. And I am glad of such a perception.

Moreover, I know that the dog will die. What difference does it make – when? In 12–15 years, in 6, or in 5? What difference does it make if this is guaranteed to happen? This does not remove my feeling of love, attachment, care, attention, actions in any way. I just know that this will happen. This is a normal perception of what is happening.

Exactly the same way as you asked the question: does sleep or food influence. You say that, according to my story, the dog seems to eat better – according to a strictly verified schedule, according to precisely verified volumes and quality of food. And here it is important to look at this.

You need to stop deceiving yourself and honestly say to yourself: I am at such a point in life where personally I cannot provide myself with proper nutrition, and I do not have enough strength for this. I do not know what to do about it.

Stop deceiving yourself with phrases like: “Well, maybe my nutrition is still normal,” “In general, everyone eats like this,” “I read that my nutrition is not bad,” “I actually feel fine.” Stop building illusions around this, calmly and honestly admit the fact.

Is it necessary to fight this? I gave an example with smoking. Why suffer for two years to quit smoking, then quit, then start again? It would have been possible simply not to suffer and calmly continue smoking. This, by the way, is a very illustrative case.

There are people who do not suffer about smoking at all. They smoke calmly all their lives – and never found themselves in this inner conflict. They did not have the feeling that “this should not be done.” And there are other people who have a state formed immediately that smoking destroys health, a perception that this is a strong addiction that is difficult to cope with. They have an automatic stop – a categorical prohibition. It is simply impossible, and that is all. This has nothing to do with the level of intelligence, upbringing, or family. This is the inner state of a person. This is his inner strength – to get addicted or not.

I knew people who were offered addictions much more complex than smoking. And someone immediately said “no,” and someone immediately said “yes.” And there were people whose life developed in such a way that they were not even offered – they had nothing to fight with. The most important thing here is not to deceive yourself.

– You very accurately said: look yourself in the eyes and do not justify yourself. What should you do if you realize that nutrition, sleep regimen, or cigarettes really harm your health, and you feel it with your body? But at the same time you cannot change your lifestyle. How should you live with this?

– The only thing that can be done here is not to enter illusion. Not to tell yourself: “This is normal,” “Once a week is not scary,” “Well, sleep today is like this – also nothing.” Do not enter illusion.

You need to know: yes, this is happening in my life, but this is wrong. This does not mean that you are a bad person, it does not mean that your life is bad. This means that you do not have the strength for this right now.

What is important here is something else – this is your responsibility, but not from the point of view of ego and self-flagellation. If you honestly admit this, the ego will not be able to create additional problems.

Yes, there exists an entire complex of external actions that can help. But when I say “complex,” I do not mean a book like “How to Quit Smoking in 300 Days.” A complex is a question of developing inner strength. Strength that allows you to see more, perceive more, do more. This is not related to cigarettes or sleep; this is the development of healthy, real perception of life. That is what makes sense to engage in. But this is labor – long-term, constant. And there may also not be enough strength for it.

People often tell me: “Alexander, we watched your meditation, we cried, thank you very much.” And they disappear. If you watched a meditation and you cried, and a strong experience happened inside – it means you hit the right place. It means you need to be here. But a person cannot even hold on in simple cause-and-effect research, in simple social everyday life and conclusions.

Thirty years ago it was difficult to explain why Sprite is harmful, a certain laundry detergent or a shampoo with a specific composition. There was limited access to information. Now almost everything can be checked.

And the question is simple: do you support lies, or are you nevertheless in honesty with yourself and in the study of yourself as a personality? What is important for you?

If you want to quit smoking so that your life becomes good – many will quit, but in complex cases – no. But if you quit because smoking is an addiction that violates the laws of the Universe, then this is another level.

The same is true with deception. You can stop deceiving because you want more money. Or you can stop because deception is a violation of the laws of the Universe. Not for profit, but for truth. Restore health – not because life will be “better,” but because you are destroying your body by eating terribly. Restore sleep – because night sleep is connected with deep soulful and spiritual processes. To violate them means to violate the rhythms of life. Stop treating people badly – not because psychology advises this, but because it contradicts the laws of life. This is a huge chance to save yourself.