— What is this topic — the fear of losing money? Even when there is income, or you’ve already figured it out, it’s stable, or you’ve earned a lot of money, many people still have the fear of losing it. I realize now that I have something like this too. What is it really? What is the nature of this fear of losing money? What are its signs?
— When we start to analyze the nature of money fear, it’s important for a person to first look: what is the cause of the formation of this fear of losing money?
It can be different, but very often it intersects and comes down to some common aspects. Why is it different? The fear of losing money arises regardless of the amount. It arises regardless of the place a person occupies in society. It arises regardless of family status, number of children, the presence of a business or job, or the country of residence. The fear of losing money is formed from different criteria specific to each person.
Why do I bring this up as an example? Because it’s very important to look at this and realize it at the very beginning of working with this fear, because it is phenomenal. Very often it’s hard to recognize whether it has truly gone away. It seems to be gone, and then it appears again out of nowhere.
The first thing that’s important to understand: the fear of losing money can exist in a person who has a huge amount of money. I personally knew someone who had more than a billion dollars, and he was still afraid of losing money. At the same time, I know people who have no money at all or only a minimal sum — and they don’t have this fear at all.
Losing money is not the same as losing savings. It is the loss of their presence, constant earnings, or income flow. A huge number of people live on a small pension, just hundreds of dollars, and simply live — and that’s all. That’s enough for them. And for someone else, hundreds of thousands of dollars aren’t enough, and they endlessly fear losing them. This aspect is extremely important to realize for further work with the causes. If it is not truly understood, it will be very difficult to deal with the fear itself.
When we approach working with the cause — why it is present at all — there is a basic first layer. Let’s move to the foundation, but we start with it.
The First Layer
There is always some simple reason nearby for why a person is afraid of losing money. For example: the business model is unstable, in six months the law will change, and the business may be lost. Or you see that many people are being laid off in your company, and fear is triggered. Or at home, your wife constantly says emotionally: “You won’t succeed” — and you start fearing you’ll lose money. Or someone has many children, and he worries about how to provide for the family. Or he was single, and then started a family. Or he lived in one country, then moved to another, and worries about how to earn there.
You can come up with countless reasons. Everyone will find or formulate something within a certain range. But these are always indirect reasons, not the root cause.
Here’s the first thing to realize: such a reason is not real. It may seem to a person that his fear is because everyone is being laid off at work. But the source of this fear is only indirectly related. Yes, the event may have been a trigger that provoked fear. But the question is: why did it get triggered at all?
Root Causes
You can separately consider why a person ends up in situations where money problems arise. There are people who work in companies or businesses all their lives, and they never have losses. The companies earn more, work increases, businesses do better — and their life flows calmly.
And there are people who even in stable systems experience this fear. For example, you work as a manager or cashier at Walmart. One year, two, ten, twenty, forty years — and you’re still there. A known case: some Walmart cashiers became millionaires thanks to stock options, but they continued working as cashiers. They never developed fear.
And others — the opposite. Why? Because the root cause of fear is not in rationality. You can be in a company where everyone is being laid off but feel no fear of losing money, because inside you are confident: you’ll find work tomorrow. And the opposite — you can work in a place where it’s impossible to be fired, and still be afraid.
There are also those who, even in very risky businesses, do not feel fear at all. Which means the root cause lies deeper than just years or decades of life experience. In most cases, it has a karmic or hereditary nature. For some, it forms in childhood. For others — more complex: not even in this life. The fear of losing money is a very deep construct.
2 Steps to Get Rid of the Fear of Losing Money
Step 1. Develop a state in which you can calmly stay with this fear for a long time and observe it.
Step 2. Relate more rationally to money and understand where it comes from.
What does it mean to relate more rationally? To understand: if money disappears — for example, you invest it in a risky asset and the company goes bankrupt — then the loss will be painful for you. If your fear is strong, you should not take on such risks. People with a pronounced fear should approach spending, planning, and money management very carefully.
Because fear manifests not only when money leaves, but also when it comes. If fear suddenly disappears, euphoria arises. And in this state a person may take irrational actions: strange spending, absurd investments, starting unnecessary businesses.
That’s why it’s important to observe yourself not only in moments of loss but also in moments of income. Observe for a long time, sometimes for years. Then you can notice changes in advance and make better decisions about money.
When you earn money while having fear, you will make mistakes about it. This is universal: if you have fear in relationships — there will be mistakes in relationships. If there’s fear in parenting — there will be mistakes there. If there’s fear in profession — there will be mistakes there.
The presence of fear is a signal. A signal that this zone requires deep work.
— What do you do with it? What solutions? Admit that this fear exists, look at it?
— The solution is to observe! And to realize that you’ll have to do this for a long time. To you, it may seem like this is not a solution. But it is a fundamental solution.
You want to get rid of it, but the desire to get rid of fear does not remove the fear itself. Most people don’t recognize its activity. They don’t realize it is present.
It’s important to understand the nature. Why? Because only understanding the nature of fear gives the right solution. And the desire to get rid of it during fear only leads to wrong actions. Because the desire is destroyed by the fear itself. Fear grows — and decisions become wrong.
— I feel the difference between the constructions: “see the fear, acknowledge it, and try to get rid of it” and “observe the fear for a long time, studying its nature.”
— Exactly, you just need to observe. But people don’t want to do this.
A person comes and asks: “How do I become a good person, how do I develop?” I answer: “Very simple — every day watch how you treat other people.” He’s surprised: “And that’s it?” I say: “Try to do this every day.” And almost no one can. Why? Because it is an endless confrontation with yourself.
I’m not asking you to punish yourself or keep strict accounts. I’m simply asking you to honestly say to yourself: “Today I treated people badly. Today I tried to manipulate. Today I wanted to use someone.”
You acknowledged it, wrote it down. The next day again. And again. That is what gives true development.