How to take action and overcome self-sabotage (3 key actions)

People come to me and say: “I understand everything, but I don’t do it. How can I deal with this?” A person tells themselves: “I know exactly what to do, but I just don’t do it. I know how to find a new job, but I don’t do it. I know what I need to do in relationships, but I don’t do it. I know how to start a business, but I don’t do it. I know how to sort things out with children, but I don’t do it. I know how to resolve financial issues, but I don’t do it.”

This topic is truly pressing. There is also another phase when a person says: “I don’t know what I should do.” But right now we are looking specifically at the structure “I know, but I don’t do.”

The main trap is telling yourself: “I know what needs to be done.” A person believes that they have understood everything and figured everything out — this is the key point. If you have such a structure, it is important to clearly acknowledge that you do not fully understand this system yet. Otherwise, the problem would not arise.

I will give an example. About six months ago, even longer, I started leading meditations in Russian. When the idea appeared to lead meditations, there was a clear feeling that they should be done in English. I can easily lead meditations in English just as in Russian. In Russian, I conducted dozens of meditations and did not miss a single Friday — I hold them on Fridays on a separate channel. But in English, I have not conducted a single one. At the same time, everything was simpler in English. There was no need to conduct the meditation live and then upload the recording: it was only necessary to record the meditation and upload it to the channel. It seemed like a simple action. I conducted a large number of practices, sessions, lead groups, but in more than nine months I still did not record a single meditation in English.

Why does this happen? How do I explain it to myself? It is important that I definitely want to do it and am sure that I need it. But I do not understand why I am not doing it. I do not relate to this from a position of justification and do not look for explanations like “now is not the time,” “not the right time in space,” “not enough technical, business, or spiritual skills.” I simply do not do it, and I do not know why.

I still remain convinced that I need to start leading meditations in English. This non-doing does not cause strong negative states in me, but it also does not bring positive ones. I remain in the conviction that this needs to be done.

In such a situation, the main thing is not to enter a state of self-deception. A person says: “I want to find a new job,” but does not take steps. Then it is worth figuring out: do they really want to move to another company? Or do they want to open their own business? Or do they not need this, and want to remain employed?

A person may say: “I understand why I am not opening a business: first I need to accumulate capital.” Do they really understand this, or is another reason hidden behind it?

What circumstances form the structure “I understood, but I do not do”? A person says: “It feels like I lack strength.” Lack strength for what exactly? Or is it a lack of faith? If there is a lack of faith, then the understanding is incomplete. Because when a person says they have understood everything — this is an ego construction. It does not allow further movement.

1. Admit to yourself: if I am not doing something, it means I still do not fully understand this issue.

There are things that can be studied for years, searching for the reasons for the absence of specific actions — and never finding them. And here the goal should not be to understand something only in order to get closer to action.

Almost every adult person has performed a large number of actions unconsciously, without fully understanding what was happening, without deeply analyzing it. Even people with a pronounced mathematical or logical mindset will say they understood how and why everything happened. But if you ask such a person: “Can you precisely explain how you found your wife?” or “Why was your child born exactly at that time?” — this will raise many questions.

A person in their life performs a large number of actions without deep analysis and perception of this topic.

2. Figure out why I am not doing it: what exactly stops me and what the reason is.

If you can reflect it not from the position “I know everything,” but honestly state why you are not doing it — this is already a step. As in my situation with English meditations: I do not do it for certain reasons. I do not know them. And if you believe that you understand everything, then calmly state the reason.

Tell yourself:

• “I am not looking for a new job because I am afraid of facing the fact that I will not cope.”
• Or: “I am not opening a business because I am afraid there will be no income.” Realize this and look at what to do with it next.
• “I am not building relationships because I am afraid of losing personal freedom and having to coordinate my actions with another person.”
• “I am not having a child because I am afraid of responsibility.”

Analyze for yourself the real reasons why you are not doing it.

3. Your inner emotional-spiritual system blocks certain actions because you simply do not need to live through them. This is also one of the aspects of your observation.

But here it is easy to fall into the trap of the ego and begin explaining everything with “karmic experience” or special destinies. I have already spoken about this on the channel regarding karmic experience.

Often you do not do what has nothing to do with you. A person says: “I want to open a business and earn a million dollars, but for some reason I still do not do it.” Are you sure that a million dollars is truly your number? That it is achievable for you?

Or: “I am not having children because right now work is important.” Are you sure that you will be able to have children at all?

“I am not building relationships because I am fully immersed in business.” Are you sure that you will be able to build relationships?

This third step gives an important observation: is it necessary that what you plan will happen? Do you allow that your plan to reach an income of 10,000 dollars may never be realized? Do you allow that the plan to build a family may not come true? Do I allow that I may never record a meditation in English?

Do you allow this calmly, consciously?

It is precisely this allowance that makes it possible to cope with the structure when something should not happen. It gives calmness in moving forward and helps, on the one hand, to see the real reason for non-doing, and on the other — to take the correct next step.

Much more important is not what you have not done, but what you need to do now, at this moment, what is your next step. This is more important than talking about what you did not do. This may seem like strange logic, but it helps to find a solution to the issue.

There is another interesting thing: when you allow different possible developments of events — adequately, within reality — it becomes easier to solve any tasks. If you physically cannot have children and allow that you will have a hundred children, this is a false construction. But if you reasonably allow different outcomes — both favorable and unfavorable — movement becomes freer.

I would like someone to have explained this to me earlier. When there is no inner trauma, when there is no blockage, when there is freedom to allow both minus a thousand and plus a thousand — and to relate to them equally.

And it is exactly this that leads to real scaling.