Are you afraid of money and avoiding it? Here’s what’s really happening to you

AVAlexander Volchek

You are asking about a certain negativity, sense of difficulty, or heavy responsibility that has developed in your relationship with money. How do you live with that? How do you form your own attitude toward it? The thing is, when you speak that way, you are approaching money from a position of running away from it. You are running away, moving away. As a result, in absolutely any setting—in contracts, in business, in your professional activities or your own work—you will strongly avoid the subject. It can be felt in the energy you bring. You will avoid discussing it. Consequently, you will create problems not only for yourself and your family, but also for the people with whom you discuss money. After all, many people struggle with their relationship with money. When you approach the discussion from that state and talk to others who have money problems of their own, you create a situation that is impossible to untangle. Tell me: do you have problems with money? Do you feel that something is not right in your relationship with money? Put your question in the comments, and I will be sure to look at it personally for you.

Write about it. Ask about it. Do not be embarrassed. See the truth I will discuss in this video. In this situation, you will make mistakes: mistakes in working with contracts, in interacting with clients, in managing and spending money. There are three sides to this I want to mention, Sasha. First, the first two. The first is this: if you are meant to earn a lot of money, if money is simply going to come to you, or is meant to come to you at all, it will come regardless of your attitude toward it. It is important to remember that. Some people receive money even though they have absolutely no idea how to handle it. They do not know how, never did, and many never will. Yet the money comes. I call that luck. Again, I talk a great deal about money that comes through luck. It is important to recognize it and distinguish it. The second point to pay attention to in your relationship with money and in making sense of it is that money comes very much through work, through the way you carry out simple actions involving money in your life.

That means you need a very clear focus: wherever you put in work, define for yourself a precise, practical procedure for handling money. How much do you charge, for which contracts or which work, and under what conditions? Put those terms very clearly on paper for the other person, whether it is an employment agreement or some other contract. And forbid yourself—simply forbid yourself—to bring any emotion into it. If there is a set of agreements A, your task is to fulfill those agreements on your side. Notice that the people on the other side may always fail to fulfill them. But if they fail to fulfill them, the only thing you can do is return to that list of agreements A. Do not bring in new agreements under any circumstances, and do not watch videos about what to do in a certain situation when someone has acted this way or that. If it is not covered in agreements A, then something will simply happen. That is a very important point to look at. And there is a third subject to examine in your interaction with money.

When you live in a state where money brings up strong rejection and negativity, you are essentially turning away from it. I can tell you, Sasha, that the fact you have earned money over the last few years is point number one: luck. It is luck, Sasha, pure luck. You simply need to acknowledge that. This is the third point: when you live with that rejection of money, that attitude, it is very important to begin seeing the truth of what is happening. The first point opens your eyes and lets you arrive at an understanding. As I am telling you now, it is luck; that is very clear in your case. The second point lets you focus on not losing the money from your own work. You put in effort and work, so it is very important to start operating according to agreements without bringing any emotional states into them. None at all. I recently made a video in which I said, “Set yourself this main task at work: I am working only to earn money.” Focus on that fundamentally and continually: the most important task you have is to earn money. Why? When they want to earn money, many people set themselves a goal like this: “I want to make money, but I also want work to be fun, or to put me in a good mood, or to enjoy it so much that I will not need a rest from it.”

People want interesting work, and that interest creates a fundamental problem. When you need to make a decision at work, you automatically, subconsciously keep starting from the question, “Is this interesting or not? Does it feel right or wrong in terms of my inner state?” You do not focus on the simple point from the very beginning. Your manager comes and asks you to do a project. Immediately, you look at it this way: “If I do this project, it will increase my income.” Or, “Doing this project will help me earn money overall.” Or, “If I do this project, my manager will be pleased, and as a result I will keep earning money.” Once you work through that, you automatically release yourself from the other things going around inside you, such as: “What if I disagree with my manager and state my position? They will not like it. And I do not really want to do the task. I think they just made it up.” You go off into all kinds of thinking instead of simply doing the task. This situation in which a person pursues interesting projects or interesting jobs is important to understand.

The person begins engaging in what we might call self-development—though “development” is a very relative term here. Very relative. It is personal gain; it is ego. They focus exclusively on their personality rather than the fundamental goal for which they came to work: earning money, on the one hand. On the other, if someone can move easily through their mental and physical, emotional, inherited, and karmic barriers and causes, they have an opportunity to truly help the company. By the way, Sasha, I think I recommended this to you. I did recommend it, didn’t I? Some time ago—a few months ago, or perhaps a year—I told you to focus your work so that every project and task you do is only for money. Not for creativity, your own joy, development, a wonderful emotional state, a lift, or happiness, but only to earn money. Be completely matter-of-fact, dry as a bone. Dry old Sasha, you see? “I work only for money. Call me whatever you want: editor, producer, camera operator, flowerbed. For money, I will do the work you need. For money!” Because the third subject I am coming to is where the whole process of reflection lies.

What should you reflect on? The third thing to pay attention to is observing what truly arises within you and what decision is there. Keep holding on to that decision, Sasha. If you hold on to your decision about money, really hold it and remember it, you will first of all remove ninety percent of the worry in this area for yourself and for other people. As soon as you remove that worry for other people, Sasha, the amount of money will grow automatically, because that is the only way it happens in the world. The only way. You need to recognize the truth. When I tell you that you earn money through luck, it will bring up a very particular state.

A very particular state. On one hand, it may bring apathy at the thought that you are not a professional. Notice: apathy may arise because you say, “So I am making money purely through luck?” On the other hand, it will provoke aggression: “Oh, Volchek, what are you talking about? I am a damn capable guy, I do all sorts of things, and you tell me I get money purely through luck. I work tirelessly, I do so much,” and so on. It will bring up both of those states. You need to observe them. You do not need to fight them, remove them, or dampen them, just as you do not need to suppress this feeling of being afraid of money. You do not need to run away from it. Imagine, Sasha, that this state is part of your life, just as you might have a birthmark. Of course, you can try to cut it out, remove it with lasers, or do all sorts of things, but you could get a blood infection and create many other problems. Or you have freckles on your body and keep resenting them. Why resent them? They are there, and they will keep appearing.

You can cover them up, alter them, have procedures done, but they will keep appearing on your body. You need to observe that. In their relationship with money, many people try to live a different life, choose idealized models, or look for secrets. Your life is unique and unfolds in its own unique way. To many people, you are an extremely rich, well-off person living in California, in Silicon Valley, eating well and living in a good environment. To many, you live in luxury, eat luxury food, are in a luxury location, and socialize with people who live in luxury. There is always a difference. The question is where you are comparing from. It always makes a difference where the comparison starts; that is important. I am suggesting that you, like other people, stop looking for approaches that are not for you and instead understand how your own life works. You can understand that only by expanding your perception and getting to know yourself. That is a very difficult subject. What is it? How is it done? Where do you find it? People ask, “Can I read about it somewhere? Can I ask ChatGPT? Can I read a book? Someone over here said something.” That is not what this is about.

Only you can get to know yourself, and it is not clear which tool will help you do it. Again, I talk a great deal about this in the various videos on my channel. Write and tell me what you think about this question, how you see yourself, what you know about yourself, and what problems you have with money. Do you have problems with money at all?